the art of over thinking.
have you ever caught yourself analyzing the details of a conversation or an interaction with someone to the point where every eyebrow shift or pupil growth was the subject to in depth analysis and interpretation?
people are not meant to be read like that. lots of situations lend way to awkward interactions and weird body language. nothing is what it seems - even what is said. although actions speak louder than words, not many can defend why they say OR what they do.
does s/he like me? why did they flip their hair? why did s/he shift when they made that comment?
ANYTHING can be the subject of analysis. but let me save you some time here — we can do one thing, mean the other or say something and do something else completely different. do not take anything face value, but at the same time, take it for what it is and go with the flow.
sitting back and reflecting on the symmetry in their face when making a promise to you to detect its validity is a waste of your time and you still probably won’t get to any answers.
it’s cuddle season.
love isn’t like anything else in this world. it is absolutely confusing and remarkably alluring all at the same time. it is an open flame that people walk into without any guards, evacuation plans, or non-flammable clothing.
relationships & marriages are the next step toward defining the love that two people have for each other. although this is the natural next step and is seemingly the right thing to do— i’m just not sure. at least, not anymore.
i am not an expert on love, but in my experience, i’ve come to wholeheartedly detest all the novels & movies that have ever shaped my most fantastical expectations and ideas on love. i’ve been the victim of this crap feeling (as, i’m sure, most others are too). and i honestly have learned NOTHING from my experiences. err- except that from this moment forward i will not be fully vested in the notion of commitment and relationships.
moreover, i urge others to please carry a small grain of self preservation when “falling” for any one person as no one really falls. people choose. no one falls into buying a dope pair of shoes; it is an inherent choice. it is a conscious action to fall for someone and i can guarantee i won’t be falling any time soon.
and yo - to all my young readers, let this not be the wind that blows out your flame of hope. let this be an fyi for your innocent soul; tread carefully.
so i won’t.
tumblr has become my diary. i vent with you and i let you know when positive things and negative things are happening to me.
you don’t judge me for my grammar or my really bad jokes.
i fucks with y’all.
in new york, dayum!
after a certain point in your life, you gotta strain away the haters and find the people who will be team you. i know there’s a lot of advice out there about learning how to keep friends, but there is a natural affinity to how friendships work and if it ain’t natural, it ain’t worth keeping. i don’t think friendships should take much of an effort. they should just exist. i also believe that the key to a friendship is trust & loyalty. without the 2, it is impossible to even say you have friends. friendships don’t even require much maintenance. they transcend time, texts, phone calls, distance, and forgotten birthdays and anniversaries.
it’s time for beyonce, corrine bailey rae, anthony hamilton and prosecco. i’d like to think they are the perfect blend of love and simplicity. sitting back and reflecting on the great week that passed and is to come. i desire cool nights like this where your regrets, debt, and foolishly wasted emotions are put on hold and all you feel is the lingering night on your tongue as you take sips of delicious wine.
happy sunday, tumblr.
there is no real qualifier of age except for the physical signs of aging. besides that, we can look at level of maturity, comprehension level, decision making skills, and critical thinking skills as other factors of determining age. i never really felt that i was getting older or the pressures of “acting my age”. however, more recently than ever, i feel like i’m understanding or rather witnessing myself and my interactions with others as evidence of my growth. although i work mostly in a school setting and socialize with younger people mostly, i find myself gravitating and hanging out with people who are my age or older. conversations that intellectually stimulated me before no longer interest me. i also find it difficult to chill with younger people even if we would do the same activities as my peers. it’s really weird, but these are just my revelations.